Know Your Blogger...

Recently some of my friends (and wife) have begun making lists called "25 Random Things About Me". In it they list 25 facts about themselves that are not widely known. Captivated I joined the parade of lists and thought "this would make a good blog post - after all, I bet people who read this would like to know more about me." I very well could be wrong, but none-the-less here is my list...

"25 Random Things About Christian the Christian..."

1. I thought everyone went to heaven (kinda like it was a birth right - you are born and one day when you die, your rightful place will be in heaven). When I was 15 (almost 16) I heard the Truth about God, heaven, sin and realized four crucial things (as I discovered them in the Bible): (1) God hates sin (2) I was a sinner (3) Not everyone goes to heaven - it's not a right (4) The only way to go to heaven was to do more than "know about" God - I needed to believe and follow Him. To put my hope, faith and trust in Him... my life has never been the same since. In August of 1992, I was saved from hell and bought (at the expense of Jesus Christ's life on the Cross) into heaven (and even more amazing) a relationship with THE living God!!!

2. I am a sold-out, bought-out, born-again Jesus Freak! I am all about the Savior!!

3. I married WAY UP!!! My wife walked into my driver's ed class my Junior Year of high school and all of a sudden the world around me stopped moving. I'd never seen beauty like I did that day - and she's only getting HOTTER! :-) It was NOT love at first sight, but I tell you I knew I wanted to have the opportunity to learn to love her! She is the most amazing woman I've ever met. She is my daily example of love, grace, mercy, forgiveness and true beauty!

4. My wife blew me off in that class and still doesn't remember I was even in there. :-) (so here that moment she walked in changed my life and she still can't remember me even being in there - she remembers all my friends though... to quote one of my students, Cierra... "sad"). lol i love teasing her about it.

5. I have 3 amazing kids - Mckenna, Connor and Jessi who humble me daily (usually when I'm not expecting it or hoping to be). :-)

6. My favorite place in the world (seriously there is no where else that makes me smile more) is laying with or near Laura - whether it be us watching a movie, tv or just talking.

7. I am a Starbucks junkie... seriously, not good on the budget. Frappaccino's are my downfall... Venti Java Chip, light with whip (the WORST PART of the drink - so bad for you!!!!) and an extra shot of espresso. At Christmas it's the same with a shot of mint! (BTW - if anyone would like to help feed my addiction, I gladly accept gift cards to Starbucks in any monetary amount!) ;-)

8. I loathe alcoholic beverages. There is not one part of me that finds any part of it appealing. I have seen it do so much damage to so many people/families. It also destroys people's witness to the world, which leads a Christian to defend their drinking with Scripture versus defending/sharing the Gospel (yes, I know the Bible is not anti-drinking... but I don't know many who drink as an act of worship or in a place/manner that is God-honoring). Why not abandon "liquid courage" in favor of a mocha or coke with a shot of cherry syrup? I do NOT dislike people who drink (hopefully that is a given - especially those who know me) because that's not it at all... I love all people!!!! I just don't understand drinking. Especially the partying scene... it just crushes me. I'm not perfect and not throwing rocks... just sharing my heart on an issue that has affected me deeply, both personally and pastorally.

9. I am not proud of who I was, but LOVE who God is shaping me to be!!! Especially over the last six+ years.

9. I struggle with confidence in myself. Though I am often uncomfortable, I think it's a good thing because it reminds me of God's greatness despite my weaknesses... that brings me much comfort. So while I lack confidence in myself (and my abilities) my confidence in God is ROCK SOLID (no pun intended).

10. I used to like New Kids On The Block. Don't be hatin'...

11. I sneak in to my kids' rooms at night just to watch them sleep a little. I often pray for them in the stillness of the night... those moments bring me to tears quicker than anything else.

12. I love that my son is a lot like me! He is my "bestest buddy".

12. I love playing guitar and singing... in my head I sound awesome... then I get on a mic and... well, it's not pretty. I hope to write a song one day...

13. As evidenced by the fact that I am typing this list instead of doing what I am supposed to be doing: I am ADD. Not on medicine, but do at times envy those with meds. I can't imagine how productive I'd be in one hour on meds. I wonder if it would feel like that moment in the Matrix when Neo dodges the bullets... that would be awesome!

14. My favorite vacation spots: (1) Disney World (wish I could go every year), (2) the beach, alone with my best friend Laura, (3) the beach, with my best friend Laura and our three babies (I love talking about God and Creation with them while we're there!)

15. I'm a movie nut and have to work hard not to allow the ART of the good movies to overrule my worldview (where I like the art and technical aspects over what I know to be True; or the message of the film be embraced, because of how well it was presented, when it should be rejected... a couple of movie examples: "Million Dollar Baby" - euthanasia, "Happy Feet" - unconditional tolerance, "Love Actually" - love is blind, uninformed and a magical feeling, etc.)

16. I love teenagers!! I think they are the most unique breed (yes, I know I said "breed") of people on earth! They're emotional, passionate, entertaining, hungry for "real" while grounding themselves in things false or unreal, and a ton of fun to talk to, love and encourage.

17. I don't like being the center of attention. I know this may come as a shock to many who know me considering I am always talking and "up front," but I am much more "comforatble" being a support in the back of a room. I think this is one reason why I love ministry so much - it's God pulling me out of my comfort zone and putting me in a place where I have to depend on Him.

18. I pray daily for (and with) my children and for their future spouses - I pray that above all else they love God with all their hearts, that His love is evident in their lives in the way they love those around them and that they serve Him with boldness and zeal.

19. I love talking about my wife and how awesome she is (I tell everyone - strangers or friends)! She's really THAT amazing.

19. Silence scares me/bothers me in a crowded room and comforts me in solitude.

20. I love video games, but always feel tremendous guilt when I play them - as if I should be doing something else more productive (as if relaxation is bad). I hardly ever play, for that reason. It doesn't help that the few times I decide to play random people just happen to stop by (sometimes saying "I wish I had time to play video games")...

21. I LOVE fantasy sports. I am the commissioner of one fantasy baseball league and two fantasy football leagues. I also just have teams in a couple other leagues. Crazy thing is, none of them really take that much time and make the sports even funner for me (though I never watch them or the ESPN highlights anymore).

22. I hate fishing and hunting and mechanical stuff... I feel quite out of place around guys who do/can (only when they talk about it... I just smile and nod). I love camping, hiking and paintball, though I rarely get to do any of them.

23. I used to hate reading, but since Seminary have really become quite fond of it.

24. 4:30pm is my favorite time of the day during the week... it's when my wife/"life" (Mckenna used to think that was Laura's title to me... my "life" instead of "wife") and children come home from school.

25. I like being this transparent and want this list to be "30 things"... but then I'd want 35... then 40... so I'll end now. :-) (BTW... I cheated and added an extra 9, 12, and 19... so this way I still only ended up with 25) :-)

Hope you enjoyed getting to know your blogger... :-) Blessings...

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Coming to Grips with My Reality TV Fascination

I think the time has come for me to admit it... I am a fan of reality TV. I've tried to deny it for some time, but as my wife and I were surveying our favorite TV shows I realized the majority of them were reality shows, for different reasons (we don't watch much TV, but much of what we watch, it turns out, have been/are reality shows). Kid Nation, though no longer on (great material for talking about matters of Faith with my children), Survivor (my all-time favorite! It always amazes me how far people will go, and how much they will sacrifice for the right price and better yet, to see those who refuse to compromise), American Idol (though this does occasionally wear on my nerves, I enjoy the back stories and those who use the platform for eternal purposes- such as Mandisa), Ramsey's Kitchen Nightmares (I love watching family-run restaurants who are falling apart pull it together as a business, and especially a family), Beauty and the Geek (not last season's, but the ones before where "beauties" were challenged to look and dive deeper than superficial looks - didn't care much for the Geek makeover part, though it was entertaining to see), and some others on occasion (if time allows - I don't necessarily set the DVR for them).

Why I like reality TV.

I know "reality" is not reality; however, there is something to be said for taking real people as they are and putting them in pressure situations and seeing what they're made of. That is why I love Survivor so much - real people forced to be in close proximity with other real people in less than ideal situations to "outwit, outlast and outplay" the others for $1 million. What are they willing to do/not do for the LARGE sum of money? Will they lie? Steal? Cheat? Hurt someone? Deceive? Something I tell people all the time - trials reveal much about one's true faith. Scripture says it like this: "Out of the abundance of our hearts, our mouth speaks" (Luke 6:45). In other words - whatever we've filled our hearts with will come out (either trickling or gushing)... if it's selfishness, ungodliness, hate, contentious thoughts, etc. - then that's the abundance that will come pouring out (trials put our real-selves out there to be seen). If it's patience, kindness, gentleness, etc. (fruits of the spirit, Galatians 5) - then that's the abundance that will be seen and demonstrated in rough times and good times. I love to root for those who refuse to compromise their integrity, dignity, faith (though most people of faith on TV are not genuine, and often misrepresent Christ, and the church, entirely), even if it costs them the competition, the prize or whatever.

Some shining moments of Reality TV for me:

• American Idol. A girl ("Bikini Girl") shows up to her audition for AI two episodes ago in a TINY bikini (producers made sure to show her from all angles - cheap!). Usually when someone shows up in a gimmicky outfit it means they can't sing and just want to exploit themselves for 2 seconds of fame (being on the rejects video). This girl, however, sang fairly well and made it to the next round (WHY the bikini and cheap sell-out?!?!). My favorite moment for her audition came when the new judge called her out for exploiting herself (noting that the male judges won't remember/recognize her with clothes on) by asking her name "because to them all you are is 'Top' and 'Bottom'". Score one for modesty!

• So You Think You Can Dance. A youth pastor (if memory serves me correctly) auditions and performs a dance that tells a story from the Old Testament (I forget which one). As soon as the judges find out it's Bible-based the hating began and he represented well! He never backed down, he didn't become disrespectful, he defended his choice to have his female backup dancers clothed and told them he refused to give up his faith for a competition. Score one for true Christianity on TV!

• American Idol. A 27-year-old man lives at home with mom to take care of her due to her medical condition. No dating. No partying. No personal life. Is it a sacrifice? You better believe it. Does it consume his life? It IS his life - all he does is care for her. But he's a Biblical picture of what it means to care for "widows and orphans" (a challenge given to the family). I do not think he's a Christian, but it wouldn't be the first time a nonbeliever was used by God to "confound the wise." (Note: I'm not saying this is the case, but it certainly is a beautiful demonstration of real love.) Score one for real love and family!

• Survivor. Any time a contestant remains true from beginning to end, refusing to compromise who they really are (I'm not talking about the "this is who I am - I don't change for no one" arrogance, but true integrity). Score one for true integrity!

Shows That Grate My Nerves:

Any bachelor/dating/love/marriage show. It amazes me the lengths people go to to win the affection of some stranger and how poorly love is represented on the shows. Just pull some people out of their real lives (away from their family and friends who they will eventually return to) and give them alcohol, a hot tub, absurd getaways with a stranger, opportunities for sick make-out sessions and you have a romance reality show. *CUE my audible "BLAH" and cup of water because I think I just threw up in my mouth a little.* This is a blog post of its own, so I'll depart from this one for now (TEENS in my youth group - we will be going through this a little more in depth in the next couple weeks in a new series called "The Love Myth"; PARENTS - teach and demonstrate to your teens/kids what real love looks like).

Note for Parents:

Reality TV is a great tool for teaching Biblical values. As kids watch people make decisions and reap the benefits/consequences of those choices it provides a fascinating conversation starter (and a great way for you to check your own Biblical worldview). Often times we find ourselves rooting for who the producers of the show brainwash us to root for (the one doing the deceiving, playing the game - as if real life should not be a factor, the relationship that has only superficial foundations versus one that is based in a Biblical definition of love, etc.). I love watching appropriate Reality shows with my kids and talking about the Bible as it applies in real life! NOTE: This only applies to shows with any redemptive qualities to them. Many of the love shows do not have this and could be more harmful than helpful for young, impressionable minds. Also - don't forget about the more impressive lessons that can be learned by kids/teens by you TURNING OFF the TV and spending quality time with them!

That's all for now... blessings!!!!

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President-Elect Obama and My Dad

To begin, I did not vote for Barack Obama. I think I've stated that in a past post, but in case I didn't there it is. Even though I didn't vote for him due to a difference of opinion in policy and such (no need in going into it), I am a fan of his in some aspects; in particular, his role as a father.

Here he is, President-Elect Barack Obama, a week from one of the nation's most historic inaugural ceremonies... making plans for the nation... making appointments to official positions of his cabinet... studying/reading/learning to better prepare himself as the next Commander-in-Chief (the Leader of the Free World)... and writing a letter to his daughters?!?!

Wasn't there a document needing his signature somewhere? Another appointment to make or meet? Another reporter to talk to? Another Staff meeting to attend?

Probably.

But instead he took time out of his schedule to write a letter to his daughters (one they'll most likely hold onto and cherish the rest of their lives - and even pass on to their children). If you haven't heard about the letter, you can read about it here. Now THAT is a real man! Busy... busy... busy... but NEVER to busy to take his daughters to school... love his wife... or write his daughters an affectionate letter expressing his dreams for them as growing young women.

Fathers, take note. It is an amazing privilege to lead your family. It also bears an enormous responsibility. Children (trust me on this) WANT to hear your heart, want you to lead them and want you to pray for and dream for them. I know this not only from working with teens, but from being one myself (as we all were once) and having a father (and mother) who DID write to me. I still have the letter my dad wrote to me on my graduation day from high school. It meant the world to me to have in his own handwriting his dreams for me... his affection expressed for me... and the pride he had in me for my accomplishments. More than that - that he took the time to sit down and write such an endearing letter truly touched me, a rough, know-it-all (all the while not knowing hardly anything) 17-year-old ready to tackle the world. Even better, still, is how much he loves, cares for and cherishes his wife (my mother).

President Obama and I may not agree on most policy, on the origin or maintanance of real freedom, on the decisions needed to be made to undergird the moral structure of this country, but we do see eye-to-eye on one very key fact: there is no unit, group or sphere of influence more essential than the family (created by God in the very beginning)!

I respect President-Elect Obama... not because he's the President-to-be and not because he tells the country they ought to reconsider the importance of family (in particular the parents), but because he LIVES his message. He is a real man - not because of the policy he signs or rejects, but the way he mans-up to lead his family. Now I pray that he leads them in the only direction that never fails, always hopes and never perishes: the Creator, God (through His Son, Jesus Christ). After all, what's it profit anyone to gain the whole world (education from the best institutions, wealth, fame, powerful positions, etc.) and "lose their soul?"

Even moreso, however, I admire, respect and love my father for being the kind of man who in all his military training was still soft enough in heart to pour out his heart to me in letters... to sit and have heart-to-heart talks with me... to love me unconditionally... and ultimately show me what a real man looks like.

Take heart, men. It's a new day in America... not because we have a new president, but because we have men like my dad setting the standard for their families - without press corps, media outlets and newspapers covering their every move. Just doing their God-given job and doing it proudly. Thank you President-Elect Obama for also being that kind of man, despite the national pressure.


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Time to Man Up...

BACK FROM THE HOLIDAY BREAK! On to the C2 Blog...

Men (all those of the male gender)... it's time to man up, check your pride for few minutes and hear me out.

Over the last several years I've noticed a sudden increase in boyhood and a sharp decline of genuine men in society. Manhood today is a joke. It's so rare for women to see true gentlemen that when they encounter one, they have no idea how to react or think. Almost uniformly women have lowered their standards for men for a variety of reasons:

1. Because they, themselves, act as "girls" and have no expectations other than purely self-centered ones (don't believe me, watch some of these ridiculous "women" parading around reality television... I digress)

2. They think the only way to keep a "man" is to meet his expectations (so they adjust to him and his standards)

3. Wishful thinking – hoping the boy grows into a man (unfortunately this doesn’t happen as regularly as we think it does)

I could keep going, but I think you get it. So what’s the point? I’m sick of seeing boys parading around as men. These boys range in age from teens to the elderly. They’re single, they’re husbands, they’re fathers, and they’re grandfathers. Why do I call them boys?

1. They focus on boyish things and put everyone else second to their whimsical “needs” (cars/trucks, houses, money, fame, random hookups/sexual relationships with no thoughts of commitment, living with a girl versus showing her he’s truly committed by marrying her, time with the other “boys” instead of being at home with their wife and kids, being lazy and making their wife work as well as take care of the home and kids while they do as they please, etc.)

2. They have no respect for women. In some instances women are nothing more than sexual objects. And don’t get me started on this culture that refers to (and wants) this precious gender whom God created to be a “helper” and companion for man as “ho’s,” b******, and other degrading names (SIDE NOTE: women, seriously - stop letting them get away with it!). Fellas – ANYONE can do the physical stuff… only real men know how to truly captivate a woman’s heart and attention. It’s not a game and women aren’t a prize to be won. They’re a valuable treasure!

3. They have no chivalry – no honor – no integrity – no dignity. Instead they live by one motto: “I’m a Man!” NEWS FLASH: Real men step up, own up, man up, serve (especially their wife and children), love, live right (even when no one’s looking), teach by word and example, and live by THE standard (God’s Word). They lose their pride and put on the coat of humility. None of this “because I’m a man” garbage. Real men step up.

Why such a harsh tone? Because sometimes the situation calls for it. Over the last several weeks I’ve seen some pretty horrendous things (with my own eyes) and had similar stories shared with me by family and friends as I’ve shared my heart with them. Here are some of these “men’s” shining moments:

- Standing in a Taco Bell line waiting for food, a 16 year old male publicly gropes his girl friend as they wait for their food. No thought of the fact that her body belongs to her future husband (and his hands to his future wife) or the fact that he’s degrading her publicly!

- Several instances of a boy “showing” his girl friend how much he “loves” her by hiding the true nature of their relationship in the backseat of his car, taking her clothes off and exposing her (and him) to public embarrassment as they are caught. How romantic! How patient! How kind!

- A married man making lewd comments to married, female coworkers, masking them as “a joke.”

- A wife eating leftovers at work and sharing with her coworkers that her husband made them and the room of women begins to fall in love with her husband for loving her that way. They say “my husband never…” or “I wish my husband would…”

- A husband who won’t take care of his own children – leaving it to the wife or family. Discipline? Forget it. Feeding them? Too hard/time consuming. Getting them ready for school? Not my job. Kids being kids and making noise? Too much to handle – someone else deal with them.

That's just a sample - I've got far too many examples to post on one blog.

Even non-Christian recording artist Beyonce wrote a VERY POWERFUL song recently about this topic, called “If I Were a Boy” (note the “boy” part of the title… not “man”). In it she sings about how she would live if she were a boy, like those in her life. Never heard it? Listen to it here (lyrics are here):

Men, this is an indictment on us, the God-chosen leaders! What happened?!?! How did we come so far?

Where do we go from here?

I am not perfect, nor am I everything my wife deserves on a daily basis. But I promise you, my heartbeat is to “put away childish things” (1 Cor. 13:11) and grow as the man God has created me to be. How do we do that?

First – swallow the pride! If we cannot humble ourselves there is no hope. If we cannot see that we are part of the problem, we’ll never be part of the solution. 1 John 1:8, 10 – “if we say we are without sin, then we deceive ourselves and the Truth is not in us…” and “we make [God] a liar.”

Second – repent! Time to change. Confess to God in the stillness of your room your shortcoming and boyish heart and ask Him to change you. Ask that He help you see how to be the man He’s called you to be… the man your wife/future wife deserves… the example your children ought to see. 1 John 1:9 – “if we confess our sin, [God] is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness”

Third – MAN UP! Realize the calling God has placed on our lives. The tremendous responsibility He has placed on us as leaders of our homes.

This is my hope and prayer for you, gentlemen. I am praying for you.

Blessings,

Christian

A man learning daily to put away childish things.

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